At this time I think that for the more severe narcissism disorders I side more with nature. I think that there is a genetic origin for this severe disorder. I think this because many children have gone through very difficult to even horrific growing up years and yet do not have a narcissism personality disorder. I also base my thinking of being more nature than nurture because of scriptures in the Bible. When God commanded the children of Israel to destroy the nations that they conquered he commanded that every person and animal of these nations be destroyed in the land. Some people will say “well the babies were innocent, the animals were innocent, God is unjust”. Or they may say, “well it stands to reason that God did not instruct the Israelites to kill the little children, it just doesn’t make this clear in the account written in the Bible”.
Another Biblical example we have of people being beyond redemption, even new babies apparently, is the account of Noah’s flood. Of all people living on the earth at that time only Noah and his family were able to be saved by God. This is mind boggling. Something had happened to almost every person living at that time to make them un-redeemable to God. This Biblical fact gives me great concern for the epidemic of narcissism among people that is now being recognized by many professionals in our day.
I had an experience with a narcissist at work a while back. This experience was shocking. The narcissist was able to change their face to the look of a skeleton with darkened empty eyes. I cannot even describe it to you properly. This ability goes beyond nurture. There is something else behind severe narcissism that I think is completely unknown to many (or perhaps even all) mental health professionals. What I saw this person do was absolutely stunning and unbelievable. I’m not sure why this co-worker displayed this face to me other than she knew that I knew she was a narcissist and she was extremely angry with me at the time about something I had done a few minutes earlier. Even during this the Spirit of God was faithful to me to give me a little ‘be prepared for what you will see’ nudge before I raised my eyes toward her and saw this dead vacuous face. This incident speaks about something going on that is way beyond nurture with a severe narcissist. Even something beyond nature in my opinion.
I do think however that there are narcissistic conditions people have that are not the same thing as what I have related above. Some professionals say that narcissism likely has a scale of mild to severe conditions. Perhaps in these situations nurture plays a greater part. People might say ” what you saw would be extremely rare”. I’m not sure. This person would be considered very nice by most people who meet her. She is considered smart, articulate, pleasant, young, etc, etc. This is the scary part. My impression of her was very positive when I met her and spoke to her for the first time. I thought she was a great person. It just goes to show how devious it is to try and discover a severe narcissist unless you spend a fair bit of time with them or around them watching and observing and noticing things that happen. I’m not sure when I first knew that she was a narcissist. I think it was accidental, which is how I think most people find out that a person is a narcissist. I’m thinking that it might have been after I set up a reward system for children in a kindergarten class to encourage them to hang up their coats and hats on their hooks. It really kills a narcissist to see others getting a reward.